Modal Verbs: How to Ask for Permission and Make Requests

This is a brief guide on using modal verbs to ask for permission and make requests. You’ll know how to do it in under 5 minutes!

To ask for permission, we use these modal verbs : can, could, may.

And to make requests, use these modals : can, will, could, would.

Which modals we use depends on how polite or formal we want to be.

Let’s take a look at some examples.

Asking for and giving permission

When you ask someone if you can do something, you are asking for permission.

Let’s see how to ask for it.

Can

“Can” is the most common modal verb used to ask for permission where we expect the answer is yes. We add “please” to soften the question. Can is less formal than could and may.

For example : 

• Can I borrow your pen?
• Can I borrow your pen, please?
• Can I open the window for a while?

Could

We use “could” instead of “can” in formal situations, such as in business or when we talk to strangers. We also use it as a polite way when we’re not sure the answer is yes.

Mind you, could is not the past form of can when you use it to ask for and give permission.

For example : 

• Could I borrow your grill for tonight?
• Excuse me, could I sit here, please?

May

We can also use “may” to ask for permission in formal situations. May is as polite as could in asking for permission.

For example : 

• May I sit here?
• May I come back again tomorrow?
• May I reserve a table for two at 8 p.m.?

Sometimes, you might find “may” in written notice to inform whether something is allowed or not.

For example :

• You may use the calculator during this test.
• You may not bring your phone to the test.

To give permission, you can simply nod or shake your head.

However, it’s better to answer with simple words :  

• Of course.
• Of course you can.
• OK.
• Certainly.
• Sure.

And to deny permissions, here are some useful answers : 

• I’m sorry, but …
• I’m sorry, but I need to use it myself.
• I’m afraid not.
• I’m afraid not. That seat is already taken.
• No, you can’t. (not so polite)
• No, you may not.

Now, compare these three sentences : 

1. May I please borrow your pen?
2. Could I please borrow your pen?
3. Can I borrow your pen?

Basically, those modals have the same meaning. The difference is in the formality or politeness.

Can I … ?  is less formal than May I …?  and Could I …?

Making and answering requests

When you ask someone to do something for you, you are making a request.

Here are some expressions you may use to make requests.

• Can you …?
• Will you …?
• Could you …?
• Could you …?
• Do you think you could …?
• Would you …?
• Would you mind …?

The question is, which modal to use?

Which modal to use to make requests

Well, in less formal settings, we usually use can to make requests. It’s more common.

For example :

• Can you pass me the salt?
• Can you open that door, please?

Will you and would you have the same meaning. But, would you is more common and polite than will you.

For example :

• Will you (please) pass me the salt?
• Would you pass me the salt, (please)?

So, to make the most polite request, we use could and would. They are equally polite.

Take a look at these examples :

Could you give me a hand, please?
Do you think you could help me carry these bags?
Could you tell me where the city library is?
Would you lend me your motorcycle?
Would you mind moving your car a little bit, please?

How to respond the requests

To answer some requests, here are some typical answers you can use.

Less formal

• Yes, of course.
• Yes, I can/I will.
• Okay.
• Sure.
• Maybe.
• Uh-huh. (meaning yes)

Formal

• Not at all.
• I don’t mind.
• We don’t mind at all.
• Certainly. I’d be happy to.
• Of course. I’d be glad to.

And, here are some negative responses you can use to deny a request.

• I’d like to, but …
• I’m sorry. I’d like to help, but my hands are full.
• I’m so sorry, I’m afraid I can’t.

Now, compare these requests. What’s the difference?

1. Can you help me, please?
2. Will you help me, please?
3. Could you help me, please?
4. Would you help me, please?

All four have the same meaning. The difference is in the formality or politeness.

Can you … ? is less formal than the others. Would you…? is considered more formal than Will you…?

Meanwhile, Could you…? is as polite as Would you…?

Common mistakes

1. May is not used to ask someone to do something.

Look at this example :

• May you please open the door? wrong
• May you help me with these bags? wrong

Use can, will, could, or would to replace the modal may.

2. The reply to a question  “Would you mind…?” is negative.

For example : 

Q : Would you mind moving to another seat?
A : Yes./Of course. (wrong)

If you answer a question “Would you mind…?” with affirmative, it means that you mind. In other words, you don’t want to move. And it will confuse the person you’re talking to.

Instead, answer with these responses:

• Not at all.
• Go ahead.
• Of course not.
• I don’t mind.
• No, I wouldn’t mind.

However, if you really mind and want to deny the request, just respond with negative responses I’ve shown you above.

Remember to always be polite whenever you can.

And, if you want to learn more about modal verbs, here are some useful posts that I’ve made for you :

Modal Verbs : How to Give Order and Advice

Modal Verbs : How to Express the Ability

Grammar book reference

Azar, Betty, and Stacy Hagen. Understanding and Using English Grammar. Pearson Education, Hoboken, NJ, 2017.

DK. English for Everyone: English Grammar Guide: A Comprehensive Visual Reference. DK Publishing (Dorling Kindersley), 2016.

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